when to speak up, and when to shut up! – by M. Sedler

I pray this book will encourage each reader to be a voice in the wilderness of life: a voice of reason, of passion, of encouragement, of leadership, but most of all of love and grace.

If you feel compelled to confront a situation, it is imperative to step forth with a heart of humility and service.

We gradually realized that we needed to ask more questions and get more information about the others perspective if we were going to work harmoniously.

Test the termperature of the water before jumping in.

When we find ourselves in a place of controntation it behhooves us not to come against an individual, but to help people expand  their perspectives and see the possibilities in God.

That is my motive for sharing is not to convince others, but to give an additional perspective and broaden their understanding. I feel I’m providing a service by helping them gain infiomattion and additional viewpoints.

Remember if you hide or stuff your feelings, they do not improve, eventually bitterness and frustration will result.

Let the person know you’d like a few minutes of her time to discuss something important.

Avoid interruptions.

Our goal should be to encourage communication and help people to find a way to speak their thoughts.

Commit yourself to finding new ways to encourage discussions and communication among your personal and business contacts.

In the end we will remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends.

Usually when we get upset it is because we do not have the final say.

I was too busy trying to help my pastor understand my perspective. Honestly it was a selfish motive.

In this game there are no spectators.

Prepare yourself for the discussion. Pray. Ask god to give you words that will be understood. If you feel overly emotional or frustrated, be sure not only to pray but also to receive godly counsel about yor upcoming discussion.

Be sure to have plenty of time for your discussion.

This is the way I’m feeling.

The most important thought to enter my mind is my individual responsibility to God.

God grant me the serenity, to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can ; and wisdom to know the difference

1 asking questions puts you in a place of power and puts the other person on the defensive

2 be aware of your pressure zone

3 use the buddy system: if necessary call a friend and have him pray for you before entering into a pressure zone

 4 says no as though you mean it: be certain of your answers  and let others know your decidions are final . you do not need to yell or argue

5 evaluate your friendship : a friend will challenge us, confront us  and encourage you i’m very little inclined on any occasion to say anything , unless I hope to produce some good by it.

1-listen, 2-clarify, 3-exaust the list of complains or concerns, 4-ask for suggestions

Our desirew should be to help others not to benefit ourselves.

If you do not have time to pray , you do not have time to communicate with others.

The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty.

Silence, speaking up, both change destinies. And when we use them as god intented, we can change our world for the better.

2 commenti su “when to speak up, and when to shut up! – by M. Sedler

  1. Carlotta, you wrote the Serenity Prayer:

    “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

    Bravo! Cinque stelle!

    And yes, it is important to know when to speak up… And when to STFU! 🙂

    • ciao Robert, a friend told me ” you know carlotta you do not really know how to talk, but you do not know when to shut up also, so u’r a mess….” – so i’m on a learning process….buona giornata


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